These past two weeks have been
incredibly slow. Partly my fault in not wanting to leave my house because the
roads are a thick clay mud at the moment, due to a new sewer system that they
are installing; but also partly because there is literally no one in town if I
do venture out my door. So I ponder weather to go out or not, and this is what
I’m making the big bucks for; sitting in my room, reading John Steinbeck,
watching the Newsroom, and painting cards to be sent back home. It’s like a
little America up in here. I know the theme of my boredom comes up frequently
in this blog and I think its because it is one of the hardest cultural
adjustments. I don’t necessarily mean an American to Peruvian cultural
adjustment period; I think it is more of an American working class to a peace
corps volunteer cultural adjustment. I
would argue that peace corps has its own unique culture, a way of speaking, a
way to pass by hours with little to do, a way to tell stories about our
experiences. Sometimes I have a hard time accepting this culture for there are
aspects that I don’t like that much about it, aspects where I find myself
judging other volunteers harshly for doing, and then I find myself doing the
exact same thing. For example I get knots in my stomach when volunteers try to
make their sites seem like the most rural, rugged, harsh environment ever, and
then I go off and start this blog post with pointing out that our streets are
pure mud and what a hardship this is for me. So while I continue to embrace
Peruvian culture to the best of my ability, I think I struggle more with embracing
the Peace Corps culture. The struggle
with being placed in new environments, knowing that we have to create our own
work, but with the expectation that we will have a lot of free time on our
hands. Time filled with a guilty inner argument between the culture I grew up
in that expected me to always be busy with violin lessons, soccer practice,
work, and studying and a culture that is telling us to get used to having
nothing to do. So I think I bring up my
boredom streaks often in this blog because it is an issue filled with a lot of
guilt which is never a very productive feeling, but one I constantly want to
take about.
Last week I was out tossing the
Frisbee back and forth with my neighbor friend, enjoying a break in the rain.
It was around 5:00pm and people were just coming back in from their farms, or
hanging outside of their houses. One of my students came riding up the road on
his horse with his dad in tow behind him, clearly just coming back from the
farm. The student slowed down to ask me a question and he put his hand up in a greeting,
which I took as a cry out for the Frisbee. I smiled and decided oh this will be
a great show for the neighbors if I can pass him the Frisbee while he is on his
horse. So without thinking anymore into I tossed the Frisbee to him, which
glided up, took a sharp turn to the left, somehow picked up speed in the air,
and went flying right for the buttocks of the horse that the student’s father
was sitting upon. This startled everyone around as the Frisbee thunked bouncing off of the horse, and
then onto the ground. I could see a rush of panic run over the face of the
father, and I covered my mouth and smiled realizing I probably shouldn’t have
done that. My host mom, who was standing right beside me had a look of horror
on her face, as if she couldn’t believe any daughter of hers would have such
poor manners. Embarrassed I continued smiling at the father hoping he would
smile back and give some acknowledgment of forgiveness. Finally, after what feels like 10 minutes he
gave me a slight chuckle, but not enough to calm my nerves. However I push through the awkwardness and go
on to confirm the times of my classes the up coming week with the student,
which was the real reason he put his hand up to greet me in the first place. I
often find myself wanting to do these crazy acts that will raise attention from
onlookers. But I never think through the
consequences of what happens when they go wrong. What happens when the horse
gets frightened kicks up, and knocks the father off? It is a risk of gaining
more impressive crazy gringa points, or losing all dignity. For some reason I
always attempt for the big points.
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